slimit

I got on the scale like 4 times this morning because I couldn’t believe I’d lost 5lbs.  I mean I’m HAPPY but I was surprised and I guess unable to give myself credit.  Nutri-system is cool but I’m already over it.  The food is honestly nothing to write home about and I believe all it does is teach portion control, but when we are finished with the nutrifood I’m just going to buy good food with the same calorie content and portion sizes for much less at the grocery.  My girlfriend thinks the food is good though so maybe the whole vacuum sealed preservative packaging is causing a mental block for me, but that’s my honest feedback.

I told her I think I’m losing weight because I dread eating that food so I just don’t so actually I’m just becoming anorexic and will lose weight that way … or blame my new eating disorder on Nutri-system and sue them.  I’m kidding, in case anyone didn’t pick up on the sarcasm.  I know eating is important and let’s face it I could never actually develop an eating disorder because I love food too much or I wouldn’t be in this boat would i?  LOL Anyway that’s my quick blog.  I hope everyone is doing well and has a great weekend!

My girlfriend and I ordered Nutri-system and it just arrive last night so we are starting that together today.  Most of the food looks pretty good, some of it I won’t know about until I try.  So Far, of course,  I’ve only had breakfast and I can’t complain.  2 blueberry muffines =100 calories and they were pretty good.  =) 

 A friend of mine did nutri-system (while developing a workout plan) and she lost a lot of weight.  She has kept it off because she has made the gym a regular part of her routine.  She’s inspired me and I’m excited about Nutri-system.  We don’t have to worry about what to eat or counting calories, etc…. We just have to pay attention to HOW we are eating this month so we can continue on our own when we are done.  They have a little online community you can join too but I’ve come to adore my buddyslim buddies so I’ll continue to blog here with you guys!  Anyway - They sent so much food It’s overflowing from my pantry and freezer lol but that’s good because when you pay that much you want to feel like you get something back and we certainly did.  Okay I sound like a commercial now but the point is I’m excited to have decent food already ready already this month! 

This blog is just me venting - it may come across as being negative or whiney … and I suppose in some ways it is, but it’s mostly just to get things off my chest.

 My world has been shaken, stirred, and turned upside down over the last few months (as I’m sure many of yours have with this economy), but I am expected to stay solid, grounded, and stable.  It’s overwhelming to say the least.  I stopped today to take in what a humbling experience I’ve had in the last 6 months.  My girlfriend (yes I’m gay) returned from Iraq in June and wanted to eat every restaurant you can think of (seriously) and of course I was right along with her.  I stopped working out and gained 20lbs in 6 months - yikes.  In addition to that my pay has been cut by 33%, but not my hours!! Due to my pay cut I had to get rid of the dream car I was driving (350z), Stop all leisure expenses, stop contributions to my IRA, change my shopping and spending habits, and work harder than ever knowing that even though the pay cut sucks I’m lucky to have a job right now!  These changes have put me into a funk and a depression.  Not only do I not like what I see in the mirror, but I have no money to join a gym or even just get out of the house and enjoy myself!  I am now living beyond my means and every cent of my paycheck goes toward bills.  From this experience I realize the things I was taking for granted.  In the grand scheme of life it is a valuable lesson, but I cannot wait for the lesson to be over. 

I’ve been fighting with a lingering cold for the last 2 weeks and I think it’s finally starting to go away.  I couldn’t do my detox / system cleanse and will probably still hold off for a few more days until I’m sure I am 100% - right now I’d say I’m 85% at best.  I guess it’s going around right now but the sickies sure have slowed down my progress.  Not making excuses but truly who wants to exercise when you can’t breathe and feel sick… not me!  Exercise aside, my diet is doing well.  I’m considering knocking carbs off of the dinner menu.  I seem to lose weight quickly when I get my carbs in for breakfast and lunch but eat only protein and veggies for dinner.  I’m not a scientist but I think it has something to do with having the rest of the day to burn carbs you eat in the morning versus eating them without burning them close to bed time.  Anyway sorry I’ve been missing from the site for days and days not being an encouraging buddy just been sick =(

I hope everyone had a great christmas!  As for me - I chose Friday as my “Weigh In” day and since I knew I’d be out of town I went ahead and weighed myself  early before I left.  I was happy to see I’d lost one pound before I went home to visit my family so 4lbs total since I joined the site, YAY =) 

 The flip side, however… when I stepped on the scale this morning I gained the 4lbs back this week!! LOL I’m not beating myself up over it too much, but it makes me realize how EASY and FAST I can gain weight VS taking twice as long to lose it!  I only go home once or twice a year to see my family and unfortunately (for my diet) we do a lot of things that revolve around food.  I definitely splurged while spending the week with family for Christmas, but I am home now and ready to get back to work…. and reality.  Let’s see if I can shed those ugly lbs again by my weigh in on Friday.

Today was our office pot luck and thanks to my slim buddy, Michael, I didn’t leave work today feeling bad about the choices I made.  This morning as soon as I arrived there were chocolate treats waiting for us bright and early… without thinking about it I picked one up, bit into it, then realized what I just did and threw it away in the trash (rather than finishing it like I normally would have). I went to my desk and satisfied my chocolate craving with a mockalate granola bar =)  During the pot luck lunch I stuck mostly with salad and had very small tastes of other seemingly healthy choices lol  I skipped desert but did drink fully leaded coke… ahhh what can I say?  Anyway the dreaded pot luck turned out to be fine and Thanks again Michael for the Holiday tips!! I definitely used them.

I was having a conversation with a friend once and I told her that I wished I liked vegetables, but I don’t and that I eat a lot of “crap.” She corrected me and said, “Well it’s not that you sit there and think to yourself… what’s the worst thing I can eat?  You simply eat whatever you want and THAT’S the problem.”

Usually my body is ready to eat as soon as I get off of work.  I came home and took out a tillapia filet from the freezer and then my girlfriend called me to ask me to bring her the jacket she left at my house.  She works outside so of course I stopped what I was doing to take it to her.  On my home I was so hungry and Chik-fil-a was calling my name.  I came so close to giving in but then reminded myself that the meal I would prepare myself would be just as satisfying once I cooked it at home and I wouldn’t feel guilty about it.  I was so right… the fish was delicious and I was so proud of myself for not caving in and eating whatever I wanted.

What is it about hearing that someone ELSE has made comments about your weight gain that hurts so much more than when you see it yourself in the mirror?  Whether it’s caddy female conversation or friends sincerely talking about your well-being it’s just so jaw dropping when you find out.  Logically I know it is not a big deal … I have made observations about people myself that I mean nothing by - things like that just come up sometimes when you’re with your girlfriends,  but somehow it’s hard to remember that when you hear that people have made comments and even called you mean names due to weight gain.  A friend of mine told me last night that people have been talking about me and my weight gain behind my back - I’ll spare the details of how that came out, but she wasn’t going to tell me that nor was SHE trying to be mean.  Anyway I suppose the silver lining is that it fuels my fire to stick to my plan to lose weight. 

So I’m sure a lot of you have heard about Acai berries being linked with weight loss products but I read a lot of conflicting information.  Some articles I’ve read online talk about weight loss pills containing Acai berries are not effective because of the way they’ve been processed and capsulized, although it is possible to find certain brands that are more effective that others.  I have some Acai tea that I bought which states that Acai berries are believed to be a “Superberry” - Either way I like the way the tea tastes and even if it has a placebo effect I suppose that’s okay with me too - at the very least I’m drinking more water with the herbal tea bags.  =)  Just wondering if anyone else has pondered the effect of Acai Berries.

This morning I put a lot of thought into the amount of time I spend sitting and laying down and it’s a wonder I don’t have muscular atrophy.  I wake up and get ready in about 30 minutes, drive to work where I sit for 9 hours and then come home where I sit for most of the night on the couch watching the news, working on my laptop, etc… before going to bed again.  Um - no WONDER my weight isn’t where I want it.  So I know that sounds like a silly thing to just now think about but I’m always BUSY so it doesn’t seem like I am doing NOTHING.  I’m not doing nothing - I’m just doing nothing for my BODY to get the movement it wants and needs so much.  So anyway starting tomorrow I want to incorporate at least an hour of movement into routine.